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Coach’s Lexicon of Footengballish Compiled by Statto
Added Time: If someone has their life extended by medical means Coach says that they are into added time.
Against The Run of Play: A harsh critic of a theatrical production.
Attendance: If Coach notices five couples on the dancefloor he calls it this. If it’s at a ball for decision makers he calls it The Official Attendance.
Auto Promotion: Any advert for car sales according to Coach.
Back Heel: Any old fashioned remedies such as and including leaches are a back heal.
Bore Draw: A newspaper cartoon that doesn’t make Coach laugh.
Bottle: Whenever Coach hears a baby crying he says that they lack bottle.
Centre-Half: A reduced/concessionary bus fare and destination.
Copa America: When old episodes of Kojack appear on TV Coach calls him this.
Creating Space: When the refuse collectors have emptied the bins Coach is impressed by the way they have created space.
Cup Final: Coach’s last mug of tea before bedtime.
Deadly Marksman: A gravestone.
Far Post: This is what Coach calls the British Ambassador to Australia.
Football Hardman: A statue of a soccer player.
Full-Time: Coach stops eating at this point.
Good First Touch: King Midas had this according to Coach.
Group Of Death: The Cemetery.
Kit Man: A model maker.
Jonty Morgan Humour Sampler 